Having a strong identity is crucial for personal development of the player. Nevertheless, a strong identity is not just made out of victories.
Playing a sport is where we chose to express ourselves, and make contact with reality.
Sports talents combine a unique personality and professionalism. The player that has this skill possesses a simple, sensitive, humble mind and is not affected by flattery.
Within the player’s mental consistency we can find cracks due to the desire of pleasing external expectations (from the coach, the public, parents, etc.).These cracks break the player’s mental consistency down. The key to success has nothing to do with proving anything to anyone because it is impossible to satisfy every external expectation.
In sports it is vital to understand what one is or what we can achieve, in other words the internal world, and what we want to show to the others or what we think we show to the others, the external world. When someone cannot solve the dichotomy internal/external and stays trapped in the results, they get stuck, and the evolution stops. This generates paralysis and desire disappearance.
There is a complicated relationship between what you are and what you do. The results speak for you but do not define you. It is essential that the players, to define themselves, take distance from their product, game, goals, shots, and results. By identifying with them, they become vulnerable, fragile and dependent. When the players believe that they are what they do, they do not separate themselves from their work. They will feel a genius if everything goes well and they will feel like a disaster if everything goes wrong. It is essential to have this difference: One thing is the player, and another thing is the play.
The result compares you to others while during the attempt you are unique. The identity of the golfer or the team does not have to arise from the results but the attempts. If we do not think it this way, we will be confused. In other words thinking that we are made of our achievements is mistaken when in fact we are made of the perseverance in our attempts. To think only about winning is from wimp.
Sportsman feels every aspect of the sport personally, in a unique way; they have to learn to validate their value in comparison with themselves and not with another player. There are also players who want to stand out compared to the others and focus on the other’s judgment. This way they can´t connect to their impulse and enjoyment. These tendencies work as distractors of the primary goal.
At the same time, the one who is already considered a “sportsman,” may believe that bad results are connected to their way of being, instead of understanding that results are a consequence of their actions. But he player is not a result; this one does not say anything of the sportsman, it does not either change or identify them. By differentiating what he is from his profession or hobby, the players step aside from the results. In other words they can say, “I am, and I am a sportsman” they distancing themselves from the results.
This allows the player to be recognized beyond how they develop their performance. Buy it also means it assumes part of his identity as settled golfer, not just a wannabe or attempt of golfer. Saying “I am golfer” means that the player considers he has reached his maximum level of performance.
A professional golfer must do the exercise of recognizing themselves as people and be conscious of their strengths and weaknesses as a human being, beyond the sport, to be seen as a human being who plays games. The player must be defined by their potential and also for their mistakes so that they won´t be exposed to frustrations.