Behind every high performance athlete, there are other players who play a key role: their parents. While each parent’s relationship with their child is unique, it’s worth taking a few minutes to talk about it.
A car running at 250 km / hr clearly does not need a driver with the same capacity of driving that another that goes to 40 km / hr. The same happens in sports. Being the father or mother of a boy who practices a high-performance sport is not the same as being a person who does a recreational sport.
Precisely, parents of high performance have special characteristics, because their children are not equal to others. They need special treatment, because they have special needs. Sometimes parents know how to handle very well and sometimes not so much. Anyway, I am convinced that everything can be improved.
Behind each high-performance athlete, there are other players who play a key role: their parents
How do we get children to trust in themselves?
The confidence and expectations of the children start with the parents. They feel confident and confident as long as their parents trust them. In addition, the parents to see the potential of their children, they want to reach the highest possible, and boys dream of making those plans.
The confidence and expectations of the children start with their parents’ confidence and expectations
At first it is healthy that this is so, but later when the boy reaches adolescence, he has to have his own confidence, and return the expectations to the parents, so that he can generate his own. This may seem easy, but it is difficult for teenagers and also for parents, who feel rejected and very confused.
How many times have we heard a dad in a competition say that his son is the best and from outside we see that he is not A) Yes? At first it may seem ridiculous, but you have to be a little careful. Behind that attitude that seems wrong, hides a father who has a high confidence in his son, and this is super valuable.
Any dad trusts his children when things go well, the hard part is to trust when things go wrong. Since the beginning, the guys who are dedicated to high performance have parents who expect a lot from them. If we compare them with the rest, they could seem demanding and even a little delirious, but that’s where some positive hides: they have a crazy confidence that makes their kids achieve incredible things.
Am I saying that having high expectations in boys is The ideal? No. The key is to know how to handle those expectations. It is so much a problem to wait a lot when you do not know how to handle those desires, that you do not expect anything, because the boy will not learn to trust himself.
Sometimes, having too exaggerated expectations ends up being counterproductive. Since boys relate good results to their parents’ love, if they do things well they feel they are more and more loved. But if they come up badly in something and the pressure to win is too much, they can be paralyzed or blocked. Yes, the subject is a little more complex than it seems.
Although sometimes you think that the title of father comes with all the tools under his arm, in many situations it is necessary to learn a little more.
To hope that the boys do not get angry or do not feel what they feel, is to want to resolve a situation without understanding it. Although it does not seem, there is always a hidden logic that we have to discover. It is also essential that parents can “save” energy for the other activities of their life. Some may feel that they neglect their work, others that they do not have the time and strength to dedicate themselves to their other children, who claim that their dealings with them are different, and above all they are right.
Athletes need other things that are not normal and that’s why their parents are not normal -not any boy is a professional athlete-. It is necessary to manage the jealousy of the brothers, especially explaining what is happening. Here there are no magic formulas, and every situation has a price that has to be paid.
Tell me how parents feel…
The connection between parents and children is so strong that, just as parents know how their child is doing in the competitions, the child feels the same. He gets as calm or nervous as his parents are. That is why, when I go to see a competition from a boy, I first look at how parents feel.
The kids are the owners of the game when they have fun
The boy who “gets excited” about a sport becomes master of its fundamental rules and understands it perfectly. And can you discover if you enjoy playing or just do it to see your parents happy? Yes, and the only way to check it is by leaving it alone. If you only practice it when the parents propose it to you, then it is a sign that you do not play for it. If, on the other hand, he “makes it his own”, he can not stop practicing it and, fundamentally, he enjoys learning.