Frustration is a very intense experience of loneliness; it is loneliness in the sense of abandonment, of those who link with others through the results.

Frustration is a constant of the psychical apparatus and the mind needs a certain level of suffering and frustration. The number of problems we face is directly proportional to the amount of stable suffering that is needed even in healthy minds. What is changed is not the amount of suffering, but the attribution to the things that make us suffer from frustrating us within expectations.

Reducing the underlying amount of frustration required takes time; it is a medium-long-term goal. In the short term, the goal should be to manage the disappointment the most efficient way and get frustrated by more complex things, while it is expected that the total amount of standard pain goes down. The level of stress not only decreases but turns into positive challenges.

The short sheet syndrome is produced because the mind needs a certain quantity of problems to maintain its arousal, it is a comfort zone. Therefore, the amount of frustration, anguish or worry is always the same only the problems change. If they are solved some, other problems appear.

The frustration of being frustrated can be more frustrating than a bad result. Being aware of the frustration of being frustrated is a good first step to understand that the problem is not in the bad result of the moment that briefly goes away with the next result. The real problem is within the frustration remains afterwards.

Frustration is proportional to the feeling of loneliness, which is related to the lack of sensitivity in the bond with the other. When player becomes closed, impenetrable and does not speak is detrimental for performance. This isolates the player away, feeling lonely and more frustrated. Therefore it is crucial it learns to speak and communicate itself.

FRUSTRATION & NEGATIVITY. What really matters when speaking about golf is the mental image of how the player will hole the ball out. Therefore, the focus is on giving a shot and not on the result.

Like this, when the shot is missed there is no frustration and a positive stress level remains in the player remains motivating him. The crucial aspect of this is keeping in mind what was imagined in the first place and not the result itself.

It is difficult to have a vision, to imagine, having expectations because you are exposed to frustration. It is easier to let imagination as an option in conditional, as a chance to avoid the risk. However the most effective thing, although it is risky because it supposes potential frustration, is to put imagination as an unavoidable constant, learning how to solve it after and not before, that is, not imagining.

When the reality does not go according to the mental image, frustration appears. By holding into what was imagined, regardless of the real result, the possibility of articulate is shut down and pulls apart what was imagined. This way, in order not to run the risk of frustrating again, imagination and expectations are nullified. But, despite of the potential frustration there should be a way out that allows the player to keep on imagining.  By holding on to the mental image, beyond and aside from the real result, frustration won’t hit the golfer. So what was imagined remains for a long term, being this one more important than the result itself, no matter how things turn out to be actually.

The inner world is more important than the real world. Therefore, the value of the mental image is so critical that leaves the result on the background. This allows the player to separate what is imagined apart form the result. A mind of high performance installs its inner world in the real world while the low performance mind let the real world to set in its inner world.

For better or for worse you must persist in the mental imaged, giving more weight to it than the factual result. Likewise, the idea of crashing is worse than crashing.

Hold on to the experience of vision beyond the result and stay focused on your mental image. Even if what you imagined turns out into ball going anywhere else, hold on to the idea of the ball going where you imagined. Keep looking at the hole although the ball goes to the other side, do not follow the ball and stare at hole in the same way that you did so when you hit the ball. No matter what happens keep your eyes on the ball even if the ball is gone.

When we are calibrating, the shot is the constant and the target and the sight are the variables. On the contrary when we are shooting the shot is the variable.

When we hit the ball, what was imagined for the result, must be sustained.

You have to put the ball in the hole, do not throw it to see if it enters or not. Do not assess possibilities

You can make mistakes stably and permanently and still keep focused on the plan you imagined. Trust is the fact that you can go beyond the results believing the things you wish. Motivation is a positive tension with something we imagine. Imagine it with more clarity and more motivated you will be

Meanwhile, you play, you have to keep your eyes on the imagined objective, and let the own game adjust to where what was envisioned.

FRUSTRATION & NERVES. The mind that is competing can get caught by two emotions: the futures ones, which are the nerves, and the past ones, that are the frustrations. The most difficult feelings to deal with are the nerves. Frustrations hurt more than nerves but are more accessible to resolve.

The absence or presence of a frustrating reaction is going to show us if the player was nervous previously or not. In case the player gets angry it reflects us that they were nervous before. Anger and frustration are consequences of being nervous, even the player itself doesn’t perceive it.

You realize which connection status you had, after the game: if you get frustrated, you were disconnected. On the contrary if you stay in the connection status, you were connected. We can realize in retrospective, which was the mental state before the execution because of the attitude of anger, or not. The reaction let us know where the mind was.

The nerves generated before the shot define the golfer’s mental system and must be learned to handle. The first step is to do this is to be aware them. When these nerves are under control, you can relax in front of the ball, taking your time before shooting.

But when you do not know how to manage this emotional state and it takes you a long time to hit. This time instead of being helpful to get rid of their anxiety, only increase it triggering a vicious circle that makes you lose your head.

The more time you spend in practice hitting the ball, the more nervous you are going to get. This situation is going to look like the competition, and you will understand how to handle the tension of that moment. It is not a repetition of shots it is a repetition of pre-shot states.

Frustration Stop Frustration is a clear effect of the failure that is caused before the reaction itself and manifested in disappointment. When the annoying feeling mentioned is triggered, a haemorrhage takes place. It must be shut off because the mental energy that is going to be essential for the stability of the psychological system could be lost.

It is desirable to develop a protocol or routine to stop such hemorrhaging of toxic, self-destructive and self-reproach thoughts. An alternative is to look at the closest referent; another is to pay more attention to the supportive applause that after the failed shot is unconditionally present beyond the fault.

Frustration Management. Sometimes the person touches a metal and gets an electric shock, a sudden painful feeling due to the electricity flows through your body. This conductive metal is charged with static electricity until it moves away once is discharged. The imperceptible energy was in the body before the electric shock and it is only perceived when it is discharged. Likewise, there are levels of subclinical frustration in the body and in the mind that are not previously registered. This frustration or tension of new stressing situations added up to the one already present in the body can overload the physic apparatus.

During a relaxed competition like playing cards or ping pong, even though the winning desire is present, the frustration is unleased previously. This way, if these kinds of games are played before the golf match the frustration level starts rising up during game from the lowest levels. Therefore the tension is smaller and bursting with frustration is prevented.

On the contrary, when at the initial frustration level is higher, the player starts playing tensed and reacts against the slightest error.

As frustration can flow during the competition, it can also be drained in a better way. But if it’s way-out or channel is shuttered, it gets accumulated. Like the lactic acid, frustration can be imperceptibly accumulated or evacuated.

If frustration does not flow it accumulates and becomes rigid and hinder. Some types of accumulated frustration are sooner or later channeled, making the player burst with anger.

NOT all frustrations flow in the same way, but they all accumulate in the same place. The hinder flow of frustration, which is also crouched, hidden and threatening, is proportional to the intense, explosive, uncontrollable, and unstoppable reaction will be.

Warming up is crucial for performance and it must be done in a physical and mental way. Physically it includes preheating the body and the shots, while mentally speaking means to get ready to compete. In other words, in order to be mentally ready getting rid of the of the shot’s expectation is necessary. The mental warm up allows the player to adjust expectations and therefore prevent the needless frustration. Shot’s expectation is necessary.

The mental warm up allows the player to adjust expectations and therefore prevent the needless frustration. Thus, the right expectations are settled down during the preheating.

Frustration hit us in different ways according to the malleability achieved after preheating. The frustration comes up to us through a frustration channel and hinders our game. This channel usually gets smaller after winning repeatedly, not being used to frustration. But it gets enlarged with consecutive defeats. In other words, by constantly losing frustration is an everyday occurrence that the player must learn how to deal with it and get more tolerant to frustration. When losing the frustration and sadness of the result seem the same, although it is not. Anger is a great shock of frustration, which high intensity gets the whole system messed up.

Nevertheless, after continuous victories the player could also be prepared to face with frustration by warming up properly. This way the sportsman is able to sustain the victory and evacuate the possible frustrations that come up during the game. Moreover if the channel is not broaden out by constant defeats, each lose will frustrate the player even more.

It must be taken in to account that after winning repeatedly, the player can get identify itself with the victory. This way, winning can become a demand to be fulfilled and lived as a burden. But winning is momentary and not the player’s identity.

Sometimes, losing can be releasing because it can be a way of reducing the expectations’ pressure. This is the reason why some players can be motivated by getting angry with themselves or after missing a shot, as there is nothing more to lose. So with no expectations left, they start playing better.

Winning puts more pressure than losing because losing breaks down the expectations of winning constantly. After repeated victories missing a shot or losing become an intolerable nightmare and frustration is not easily managed.

Paradoxically, to get ready for a game and control it, first you must contemplate the possibility that the ball cannot go where you want. Afterwards in a sensitivity and visualization level, feel like the ball is going to do what you want.

Charisma vs Frustration

At the heart of the charisma is the not easy capacity to let oneself be loved

The autonomy of the player is related to the lack of necessity or dependency on the opinion of others.

But, on the other hand people from the outside are with much more criterion of reality than they seem to be. The contact with the public is essential. If they applaud, they are talking and saying a thousand things. That flow of energy must be taken an advantage.

Notwithstanding this, a healthy bond with the environment can enhance performance. Moreover it is a source of motivation that serves to sustain difficult moments. This healthy relationship is here where the charisma is noticed and necessary. Beyond the profitable charisma, this is the idol to follow and admire wanted by the public, it is an excellent performance lubricant.

A golfer is human being whose personal and professional life must be pulled apart.

In order to do so, it would be necessary to see if the golfer needs people recognition or not. It could be better to have parallel social networks, the public and the private one.

Error Handling

The error leads us to a horrifying fantasy: the loneliness experience, anger at the frustration of abandonment. Like the baby who cannot find their mom; you come out of that nightmare looking for someone or something, getting contact with reality.

The players have the responsibility of preparing in the best way possible during the training time and do the best they can do in the game. But, you can make mistakes but you can´t be irresponsible. Messing it up does not mean that you are an irresponsible. Some players get angry for each mistake trying to give others an image of “responsibility” because show an image of irresponsible, is worst. Being confident does not means underestimate the game or being irresponsible; it means being connected that implies being beyond the competition.

The optimum mental state is reached when the player is not affected either by the defeat or the victory. It is easy to know how to win because it is just a confirmation that everything is going ok. The hardest part is to know how to lose, how to process the error, the defeat without being affected.

Mentally planning a game must consider a certain number of allowed errors. The fantasy of no failure generates a lot of rigidity to the mind.

Each match is constructed by the way errors are managed. A match is a sequence of errors. If the mind suffers each error, it will go a stair down. But, if the mind is well focused, it will be centered on the attempt and it will go upwards until it gets imperturbable. With perseverance, the player will understand how to give the error the right importance. Therefore you must put the failure in context, you are not good because you did it well, but because you did not fall when you did it wrong. You’re good if you’re patient.

It is essential to contemplate the possibility that things don´t turn out the way we want. You have to assume this, accept (it) and process it. This situation leads to a better game. The possibility of not scoring exists. The player shouldn´t deny the chance of missing a shot but solve it. By knowing this tension is released.

The psychologist must shape the golfer’s t mental structure so it does not rationally process the error. When we are kids, we do this without thinking about it: we fall, and we get up. When we grow up, and we make an error, we process it differently.

When a player scores, the highest intensity is needed to take advantage of the match: making the most out of the opponent mental disturbance. When the other scores, the player is in the most vulnerable and messed psychological state. The defeated player is under a lot of pressure as a consequence of the frustration. The capacity of resolving this moment will define their performance. The golfer that is not troubled by this situation has an excellent mental state. Recognizing opportunities and getting ahead is something that the player should make naturally. Therefore this situation should be deal with no despair neither feeling that this is their last chance because pressure and tension spoil the performance.

What is the fundamental problem of error? That I lose the point or the certainty that there is something that I cannot do or understand may be? Or is it that this mistake will be repeated indefinitely because I have no control over it? There is a learning path that goes from the error until the player learns how to do that action in a right way.

The real error means failure in learning, when there is no learning from the situation. Doing something wrong is not the problem. If you don´t learn something from that, you will have a problem. If we lose the logic of the game, more errors will be made and a cycle of excuses is triggered. These excuses imply not getting involved in the situation or expecting to learn. Some golfers compete with an excuse to play and others make the game an excuse to compete.

Being desperate to win only drives players to make mistakes. Thus, the player automatically adopts the strategy of another player or team, or as he feels desperate, forgetting their plan or game system.

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Si tu objetivo es dar un salto de nivel, acá estamos para ayudarte. Mi nombre es Rafael Beltrán, soy Doctor en Psicología, especializado en la psicología de negocios y del deporte.


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