ANGER AND COMPLAINT

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It is inevitable that if you are angry and yell, you are tense; and this impacts on your game performance.

If you get angry, you were wrong before. Anger is proportional to desperation to win. Anger is a way to lose fear; it is a way to reduce pressure. It becomes an unconscious device to justify the mistake.

Getting angry is good as long as it is a symptom, like fever or fuel light. If the fuel runs out it is a problem that spotlights a real problem beneath it. In other words, running out of fuel is just a sign or consequence of deeper problem or real cause.

The symptom, getting angry for example, is not bad itself because it warns us in advance that there is something that needs to be worked on.

If you are angry is also because you don’t understand something or there is something wrong and you and you don’t know how to resolve it. This is that you don’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, so you are confused and desperate. The more you train, the more you learn and understand, so the less you get angry.

The anger model focuses on the result and its inevitable frustration, not on the attempt. In frustration and anger, you see the annoyance or disinterest of the player. Frustration and anger make the players give the best of them; this implies a very high risk because they are in the limit.

Sometimes players do something wrong losing their fear to lose, because they have already lost. This they do something correctly. The anger appears making the player not to think, and the fear goes away.

When the players get angry with them and do not want to talk to anybody. But this should not be taken personally and the people around should talk to them, because loneliness is the key for frustration. At the same time, it is essential to work on their maturity in communication.

When we get angry, we bury the possibility of asking ourselves what happens to us. Psychologically speaking, it is to crucial to ask “why did I do that?” This way we can understand and learn from the situation. Getting angry, frustrated or breaking everything are reactions to disliking yourself or misunderstanding the situation. Not seeing the forest for the trees can make you feel stucked-up. You get angry because you do not understand what happens. Once you understand it, it does not bother you anymore. What is understood does not trigger anger. When thoughts like “I want to kill him, but what shall I do?” appear the best way to go is reformulate and ask yourself “shall I get angry or try to understand?” This you realize that you have to start working on your mental skills in order to understand the situation. By improving your understanding abilities you will be able to calm down, being patient and confident to persevere.

The idea of learning is there because you see a horizon of understanding about what happens to you. The exit is learning.

The one, who even getting frustrated never complains, is a good symbol of assuming responsibilities. Being positive takes you out of the place of complaint.

Anger is the counterpart of fear and despair. It is an active and denial version of reality that provokes suffering on the inside.

Nevertheless, anger regarding commitment to the goal is not bad.

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Si tu objetivo es dar un salto de nivel, acá estamos para ayudarte. Mi nombre es Rafael Beltrán, soy Doctor en Psicología, especializado en la psicología de negocios y del deporte.

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